Have you ever met someone who made you wonder, "Why did he say that?" every time he opens his mouth? Someone you want to present with a shovel because every sentence is just digging him in deeper?
It's torturous. There's really no way to tell him what he is doing to himself, but you feel bad just walking away in the middle of his talking even though you know he's not trying to actually communicate and is just babbling because there are people trapped in chairs around him during this getting-to-know-you time.
He holds the entire table captive, making everyone uncomfortable with tales of all his past girlfriends who dumped him and married the next person they dated, which seems quite reasonable the more he talks because anyone would seem like a prince after him. He complains about being invited to the weddings and the ones he's still acquainted with and how much he loathes their children (he refers to them as "disgusting little rats"). He composes crass poetry and uses foul language liberally.
He is genuinely oblivious to the fact that every minute his mouth is moving is making the people around him dislike and eventually hate him even more. It's horrifying and fascinating at the same time . . .
Even Allie can't seem to figure out a way out of this kind of awkward conversation . . .
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