How to Recover from a Destination Reunion and Running Out of the Allergy Med

The post-activity hangover is real!  Did my best impression of an inanimate object the day after the Reunion, but this week was tough.  

#ThisEffectWasVeryDramaticDuringTheReunion

I have officially run into the dreaded "now all the things I've been trying to get moving all year are finally moving but all at the same time oh no" stage of multiple project management.  It can be really overwhelming, especially when I am acting both as a SME and a project coordinator of other people on one of the projects.  (I am historically bad at trying to fill both these roles simultaneously.)

#Please

And my allergies / MCAS stuff are eating my lunch now that I've run out of one of my allergy medicines.  The pharmacists who couldn't refill it because it hadn't been 90 days when I last was visiting home said it wasn't a problem because it is actually a cheap, over-the-counter that's been around for decades, and I should be able to just pick it up at any drugstore!  

It is not, in fact, available in Canada.  I was rationing it, and now I'm out, and it's exhausting.  Definitely just what I need when I'm contemplating how many 12-hour work days my body can reasonably handle (answer: less than 1 right at this time) a week.  And the inflammation makes me desperately long to be efficient and do it all myself and less patient with the 3x as long it takes to be training a bunch of people on the process and then checking all their work and following up and . . .  Yeah, very tired.

#CanYouSmellThem  #ICouldForLike1Second  #Glorious

My "temporary boss" here continues to basically not communicate with me at all or respond to email, but I've been keeping in touch with my various bosses at my home site.  They know more about what I'm doing than the person who works in the same building with me.  Which is unfortunate because I encouraged them all to meet, and they decided the person here would be writing up my performance review that the home site managers will use in internal calibrations. Sooooo . . .

In positive news, the previous manager who more or less caused all the shenanigans due to incompetence seems to have really taken that situation as a wake up call to educate herself on how to be a better manager.  Since she wasn't getting that training and mentoring and help from the company, she's been out listening to podcasts and reading articles and talking to other managers in the company, and she's decided she'd like to take one more crack at actually keeping me after this assignment is over.  She can't promise anything, but it sounds like she, too, is tired of losing all the good people and never trying to do anything about it.  She's thinking maybe they don't ask for what they deserve, and that's why they don't get it.  (These are things I have talked to her about over her years as my manager, but she hasn't had the desire to actually address, so YES.)

Meanwhile, my current actual manager (it's complicated, but I'll be reporting to him when I go back if it doesn't change again), when asked if he could articulate what it would look like for me to stay and be successful, literally had never thought about it.  He's always been THAT convinced that I would leave (which kind of contributed to the shenanigans).  Ugh.  But he sees his role as totally helping us achieve our career goals!  Somehow?

So maybe good news, maybe not-so-encouraging news.  Possibly progress but also teetering between cautious hope and "the wave of not-caring" of burnout that I've been fighting since my dream was with cheerful incompetence destroyed by bad management last year.

I've also failed at "mentoring" an aspiring project manager who wanted to do it himself and has just flat out been unsuccessful.  I'm not sure, but I think if I wasn't fighting the burnout, I might have had the patience to schedule time with him and make him watch me do the things instead of giving him clear instructions about what to do and then giving those same instructions next time because he still can't figure out how to do them and won't schedule the time with me to teach him.  I'm not sure, though.  That only tends to work when you're dealing with people who want to learn and be mentored, and I just didn't really get that vibe from him.  

#Still #Yuck #Whyyyyyyy

I'm taking over the project again, and we accomplished in one meeting what he couldn't figure out in 2 months of weekly meetings when he wasn't canceling them randomly.  (Not rocket science.  Just basic task breakdown of what needs to be done, who will do it, and how long it will take.)  I feel bad that I couldn't successfully teach him, and I'm hoping I have more bandwidth and patience for this other increasingly big project because my body simply won't let me do all the work myself, and I don't want to compromise like I had to at the beginning of this year with these same folks.

Too many things to do on all the projects, and I feel like I'm going to fly apart.  Or maybe we'll make it work.  Stay tuned.

#INoticedTheGiantSpidersInTheParkingBasement  #ThenINoticedOneRidingOnMyCarAndHopedItGotBlownAway

#ThenIOpenedTheTrunkAndSawOneFallInAndLieUnmoving

#ThenTheNextTimeIOpenedTheTrunkItWasGone

#SoIfMyCarBecomesTheSpiderKingdomAndCrashesYouKnowWhatHappened

I would never leave you with spiders, and since I gushed about Bookworm last time, here's a timely and unrelated reminder for the next several months and maybe all time:

#LouderForTheBackRow

Hang in there, friends!  Take those naps if you can!  And if you're a parent, keep up the difficult but good work of helping to raise humans!

How to Have a Destination Reunion

Every year some college friends and I try to get together.  We generally go to someone's house and hang out for a few days.  We try to eat some delicious things, watch some shows together, talk about books and life and stuff.  On rare occasions, we have Destination Reunions where we meet at a place.  Yellowstone and Oregon and now Toronto.  

#MississaugaFromTheRooftop

#BloorWestVillage #IHavePassedThisHeartAThousandTimes #NowThereIsPhotoEvidence

Food

#PAI4Ever

#WVRST

#BangBang #MisoCherryAndGreenTeaSomethingForAdventurousD

#ChickenPockets4Ever

#ZoomInAndLookAtTheLegsOnTheSideOfThisBuilding  #BecauseWhyNot

Fancy Library

There was a special exhibit for their collection of historic children's literature on the top floor, and I found something odd looking around it.  One of the horn books from the 1800s had the u and v reversed in order, and the other did not have the J.  The note next to them explained the J and its significance but didn't mention the letter order reversal.  I asked about it, and apparently none of the staff there had ever noticed it.  So if you visit later and there is a note about the reason, let me know what it says.  : D

#5FloorsOfAwesome

Fancy Food

#Fancy  #LobbyOfHotel

#AfternoonTeaAtVictoriaCafe  #SconePlateNotPictured

Moon

We were finishing up for the evening when I looked out the window and saw the enormous orange-red moon just clearing those buildings.  As usual, it looked smaller the higher it went and much smaller in pictures that it appeared in real lie.  We went up to the roof where we could see it more clearly and the heat and humidity were quite manageable.  It was quite the nightcap.  #VivaReunion

And now back to reality, naps, and nonfiction.

#Preach

#Truth  #ConsumeInformationResponsibly

#HangInThere

#FunFancyLibraryStuff  #AlwaysAGoodTimeForNaps

Hope you have time for good food, great friends, naps, and Reunions this summer!  

How to not bruise fruit, books, and looking forward to adventures

#OrAllergens  #MyPoorSinusesAndLungs  #WheezyPoetry

Friends.  I have mentioned my delight in being able to walk down the street and purchase fresh fruit.  

#IAmEnjoyingThis  #I'mGoingToMissItWhenI'mGone

It's interesting because I always buy too much and then smash it all around on the way home, so I have to race to eat it all before it goes bad.  #OhNo  Is there a good way to carry bruise-able fruit in a bag without mortally wounding it?

#AlsoTrueOfFruit?

I was starting to wonder if there would be cicadas here.  They've started making their presence known on the warmer days.  I miss drowsing in the hammock to their chanting.

Cicadas also mean it's hot.  And it has been warmer, for sure.  And humid.  And my body is . . . you know, bad at summer.  After the first 5 minutes of warming up, I am walking at exactly the same speed.  then at the end, I cooled down and reduced speed.  My heart . . . I mean, it does its best, and I appreciate its effort, but, yes, my autonomic nervous system continues its dysautonomic ways.

#AForEffort

Still taking it easy.  Every time I have the thought, "I need to rest today.  What on Earth will I do with all that time?"  I generally have a thought like I did this Saturday morning, "Oh, no, I will have to read a whole book!!!!"  And I did.  Second to the last book in a loooong series.  How can this author make a really long conversation just as compelling as the action-y bits?!  I don't know!  I just enjoyed the ride and finished up only a little later than I should have.  It was glorious.  One more book left.  Coming out very far away.  Plenty of time to reread from book 1 should the need arise.  #AscendanceOfABookworm4Evar  #OrAtLeastOneMoreBook  #AndHopefullyAMillionSideStories

I'm being especially gentle with myself because I have friends coming up to visit later this week, and I will need all the stored rest I can get.  : D  It's very hard to be so excited about the people and all the things while also knowing that I knocked myself flat with just 2 days of adventure.  There will be 4 days of adventure with this group (and one scheduled day for collapse) before a very full week at work.

#ButItWillAlsoHaveSoMuchFun  #AndSittingAroundTalkingAboutBooks  #AndReadingBooksTogetherInTheSameRoom  #AndWatchingFunThings

Hugs and rest and adventure to you in the coming week!

Sunburn, Families, and TinyBirds

This is someone who is serious about not getting sunburned.  Also someone who lives in a place where the weather has been very reasonable.  And has a stealth knee brace on.  Hi.  

Also, apparently, as of today, I may have a lot more trouble getting pictures into these.  Stay tuned.

#PrettyPlantsArePretty

Also, I have scored a great victory!  Finally successfully took pictures of the tiny birds!  Also a video that is very cheerful but that my computer will now not let me upload.  Here are some static birds.  (Maybe.)

#MaybeTinyStaticBirds

The family came!  A time was had!  Fish were petted!  No one got kicked out of the hotel for being silly!  There was a pool!  

#2DifferentPoolsForFishInTheHotel

Canadians hate shade?  I guess?  The hotel pool had 0 shade options.  So did the swanky top floor of my building.  Which I have now seen because I showed it to the visitors.  Seriously, not a single lick of shade in the whole place.  I don't understand.

I was able to grant my niece's greatest wish: to ride transit.  We did a streetcar trip AND TWO subway rides.  There is proof!

#BeholdTheStreetCar  #ThereWereSoManyDogs  #WePointedThemEachOut

The fam came during Canada Day, when most people apparently leave the Greater Toronto Area, and there were very few children about.  Almost everything was closed, but we did manage to find one of the ramen places recommended by my ramen-loving friend.  

The day after Canada Day was NOT a holiday, and there were still very few children around.  I suggested it might be because they have subsidized childcare because they believe it is a community and economic good, like many developed countries in the world.  I looked it up, and the goal is to cap childcare at $10 a day across Canada.  Some provinces are there.  Others have cut the cost for parents in half (Ontario).  The visiting fam say they have spent more on childcare than on their mortgages (they do not have a small house).  I hope we get costs for child care and elder care to a point where they are reasonable in the U.S.  I would love us to value caring for each other in community enough to make this happen in my country.

#OnTheFerry  #WhereThereWereMoreKids  #NotJustThoseInMyParty

#OldestNephewIsNotReallyGrumpy  #JustVeryTired

Oldest nephew has been doing a lot of growing and a lot of activity.  Oldest nephew is exhausted from this.  I encouraged oldest nephew to find a nice tree in the middle of the part to sleep under.  He walked to the first tree along a busy cross street and sacked out with a towel.  We sat at a picnic table in the shade and watched everyone walk past unconscious nephew.

#Unconsious6Foot3InchNephewCurledUpRestingInNature  #RightNextToTheRoads  #Don'tWorryItWasOnTheIslandsSoNotReallyAnyVehicleTraffic

#OnTheFerryBack

I like this blue/green set of buildings.  Youngest nephew approved.

We spent some time together across a couple of days. I had taken a third day off and spent most of it in bed from overdoing it.  I also . . . somehow got sunburned.  I used the serious sunblock generously and evenly and still got burned in some places but not others.  I planned to bring the hat, but then I was rushed leaving the house and then I was on the train and wondering where my hat was.  Answer: In the closet where it lives.  #IWillBringTheHatNextTimeDagnabbit

Family ended their visit with a ridiculous number of $1 hot dogs at a Blue Jays game (while I crashed) and then some ziplining at Niagara Falls and then excessive quantities of meat at a Brazilian steakhouse and a long drive home (while I crashed).

 

#IWouldWatchThis  #AndTryToGetOnIt  #IWantAllTheShelvesAndAWindowSeatSoBad  #BooksAreGoodCompanyBetweenNapsWhenYouOverdoIt

Taking it easy to continue recovering.  One of my favorite authors released another novella, and oh no I just had to rest while reading it on Saturday.  : D  #Penric4Evar.  

Hope you have a week of mild weather and calm and lots of poetry all around you and in your head.